I have lived much of my life doing wrong! What I mean is I have done lots of things that I knew was wrong, but I just didn’t care. Sure I have done some things right and I could have been much worse, but still my past haunts me. I completely disregarded what my parents had taught me and just did what I wanted. In some cases that may have been a good thing and in my case maybe it is too. The truth is I am a lot like my parents as much as I am not. But personally I feel like I have let them down. I could have done so much better in my life and that is a regret I have lived with. Yet, I know that God has a plan and he always did.
I have struggled with regret and I know I am not the only one. It is a kind of battle in my head. On one hand, I know God has used my mistakes and my pride to accomplish things in me that maybe I wouldn’t have learned if I had done everything perfectly. But, on the other hand I have lived with so much regret over the choices that I have made. I have beat myself up over many things. I should have done this and I shouldn’t have done that! Either way here I am and here you are. We can’t change the past but we can work towards a better future.
Regret is evil! It paralyzed us as it did and does to me. Regret keeps us stuck in the past, stewing over it again and again. Trapped! Thinking and fantasizing about what we would have done different. It keeps us from accepting what is NOW and moving on. In the mean time life goes on and we aren’t any happier. I think the Devil loves regret and he knows better than us that it will destroy us if we let it. That is what he wants, to destroy us!
When we stop moving on we let time pass us by and it only makes us unhappy bitter people. We forget about God’s plans for us even among our mistakes, our sin. We begin to blame God for OUR choices because he just sat there and let it happen. I can’t tell you how mad I have gotten at God, blaming him for my life. But, I am not mad at God I am really mad at myself. Why didn’t I just do what I knew was right? Why did I make choices that I knew would cause a certain outcome? Why does God allow us to fall flat on our faces, over and over again? The answer is something I had to learn the hard way and a lesson I continue to learn. I hope you are learning that too.
I can see clearly now about what I did to get what I got. It’s to late to change the past, but I can change the future. We can begin daily to become who we know God wants us to be! I wish I could say that was the easy part but it’s not. Why is it so hard to be who I want to be? That part I haven’t figured out yet. In many ways I have given up and at the same time I give up on a weekly basis. I want to put regret aside once and for all and focus on my future by being who I need to be now. I hope you want that too 🙂
I want to be the best version of my self. I know that it starts with killing my regret! So why does God allow us to fall flat on our faces over and over again? Because, what doesn’t kill us will make our soul stronger! How will we learn if He doesn’t allow us to make mistakes? I am not talking about God approving of our sin. God hates sin! But, he knows that we humans just got to learn the hard way. He allows life to teach us. He knows that when we recover we are much stronger and better for it. Like the advice he gave to Peter who denied Christ three times. “Simon, Simon, behold, Satan demanded to have you, that he might sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned again, strengthen your brothers.” (Luke 22:31-32)
I hope that by telling you my stories I can strengthen you, and encourage you to be the best version of yourself. In conclusion God doesn’t want us to regret which is evil. He wants us to just say thank you and become something that He can be proud of!
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